Merriam Webster defines will as follows:
Will –
Desire, wish
Many pagans, not just those who follow the Wicca traditions
follow the Wiccan Rede. The last eight
words of the rede are: “An it harm none,
do what ye will”, from Doreen
Valiente – 1964.
So what I take from this is that this means, as long as we
don’t hurt others, we can do as we desire.
Our will is our desire. Immediately
from this, I think of bullying and shaming.
I've written pieces in the past on both topics. Just a few weeks ago in my
V is for Views, I talked about this very thing.
Many people today seem to think if you disagree with their
stance on something or have an opinion on something then you are bullying
them. They think that if you say I don’t
like x, then anyone who does like x or who is x, is being shamed.
A bully is a person who uses strength or power to harm or
intimated others who are weaker. To
bully someone means to use strength or influence to intimidate someone, usually
forcing them to do what they want. Being
unkind in itself is not bullying. (article linked)
Shame is an emotion usually related to guilt. Shaming is
force someone by making them feel ashamed. Disagreement
or criticism is not shaming. (article linked)
As a victim of child sexual abuse, incest, physical and
mental abuse as a child, as well as a rape survivor, I can honestly tell you
what shame feels like. As a person who
is plus sized, I can tell you what it feels like to be shamed into not going
into the gym every day. I can tell you
how it feels to have my very will, my desires crushed by others. I can tell you how it feels to have my
assistance turned down because I wear a pentacle. I can tell you how it feels to have mothers grab
their children’s hands and pull me out of my vending tent because they believe
that being pagan equates to being evil.
I can also say that I have been around many people in all
these same environments and not been hurt.
And if those people are in those environments or participate in them, it
doesn't add to my shame. My feelings are
my own. No one owns those feelings.
“No one can make you feel inferior without your consent” – Eleanor Roosevelt
While others can attempt to bully me, they are not bullying me if I do not give in and give them what they want. While others can attempt to shame me, they cannot shame me. They can try. But I have to be secure in who I am. As a woman, as a mother, as a wife and as a pagan.
What I’m saying here is that we as individuals need stop
being so quick to jump on the new bully/shame bandwagon. Not ever disagreement is bullying, not every
opinion is an attack.
Let me give you an example.
 |
| By User:Rockpocket (Own work) [Public domain], via Wikimedia Commons |
I do not like back hair.
It grosses me out. I don’t like
it. Period. It is not attractive and I don’t want to see
it. And that’s OK, because some people do like it. Some want to see it. Some want to run their fingers through it,
play with it and caress it. And that’s
OK too.
Now quickly before the comments come rolling in about “How
can I say this?” “What about the KKK?” “What about hate groups?” “Don’t they have a
right?”
Well yeah, actually they do. They have a right to hate you for any
reason, or for no reason. They have a
right to be just as ugly as they want to be.
They have a right to not like you. (Did you hear me?)
Yeah, that’s right.
Christians have a right not to like gay people. Races have the right to be separate from each
other if they choose. It’s their
right. It is their “Will”.
That being said, keep in mind, one’s rights end where
another’s begin. That means that the
most racist hateful person on the planet has the right to yell to high heaven
their horrible beliefs, I have the right to rebut them. I have the right to join the discussion and
give my point of view. I have the right
to say what I need to say, just as they do.
I also have the intelligence to understand that some fights cannot be
won, and I can agree to disagree.
Our will, our desire is our own. I am not Wiccan. However I
do believe in the rule of three, and I do believe what you send out comes back
to you times three. I believe that if
you send out positive and if you do your own desire and harm none, you will receive
that back to you.
Blessings
Sosanna
)O(
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