When I say No, I Feel Guilty.....

Coming off a wonderful 42nd Birthday weekend, first I have to say I had a great time. Lots of well wishes from my Facebook Friends and blog followers coupled with well wishes from wonderful Husband, my aunt Nadine and my sister Kristy. Unfortunately it was also joined by the fact that my mother forgot my birthday.... again.

To say that we do not have the best relationship in the world is a gross understatement. Estranged, puts it mildly. My mother lacks the tools to have adult relationships with others. She wont' take her meds and she tends to "think" like an eight year old. For example yesterday we were discussing her health and we found out she's not taking her blood pressure medicine or her taking her blood sugar tests. My sister (the RN) did those two tests on her and her sugar was over 500 and her blood pressure was 202/95. She's looks like she's on death's door and when I ask her if she's taken her meds she directly tells me to stay out of it. Hurt and sad I let her be.

What's all this leading to? Well I started a new book this weekend called "When I say No, I feel Guilty". I'm only on page 36 and I've found some pretty incredible information. For example, I manipulate my husband. If you told me that on Friday I would have denied it. But saying things like, I need you to get up the doggy poo because "boys" do that. Was a way for me to "guilt" Eli into getting up the poo by trying to make him feel "Well if I am a real man I'll clean this up". I nearly fell off the couch when I read this part. How could I do that to someone I love?

I'm still reading so at least I'm not being so pig headed that I can't see my behavior from other prospectives. I'm extremely curious to see how it ends and I know that even if I don't learn another thing from this book, I've already learned that it's ok for me to say when I don't like something. I don't have to say why I don't like it. I can just not like it and it's ok!

That makes me smile.

Blessed Be





My little sister Kristy & I.

I DO

Photo Credit - Renee Olson








Yesterday the Attorney General for the United States of America announced that it would no longer defend DOMA in court. DOMA, signed by President Bill Clinton states that only marriages between one man and one woman would be recognized for federal benefits by the US Government.

Further, individual states have passed similar baby DOMAs that basically state that they will not only not allow marriages between same sex couples but also not recognize marriages preformed in other states, in effect voiding the Full Faith and Credit Clause that states that all states should honor and give full faith and credit to those documents and orders by all other states.... as in marriage licenses. We don't expect our citizens to go to each of the states to get married as they pass through it's jurisdiction. We as a group of open minded justice intending people want to say yes, you are married in this state too. You don't have to marry in our state to have those benefits entitled to you by marriage.

(from the statement)

“Congressional leaders must not waste another taxpayer dollar defending this patently unconstitutional law,” said Solmonese. “The federal government has no business picking and choosing which legal marriages they want to recognize. Instead Congress should take this opportunity to wipe the stain of marriage discrimination from our laws.”

A lot has changed in the years since DOMA was enacted. Laws that state that sexual conduct between same sex partners is a crime have been removed. We have seen the repeal of DADT, which will allow Gays and Lesbians to serve openly in the US Military. We have seen other countries around the world and states in our own union granting marriage rights to us. I'm so excited to be living in a time to see all these changes for the LGBTQ Community. I know the road is long, but I'm prepared for the trip.

If you'd like to read stories from the actual people fighting the fight for marriage take a moment to read Hitched! Wedding Stories from San Francisco Hall. This is a collection of essays by those that stood in line and waited to be married before the right was yanked away. My contribution to this was accepted by the editor and published in this collection.

Note, the letter to Congress was just released. It's an excellent read. (LETTER)


Blessed Be

First They Came ....

As some of you may know, I'm battling a cold right now. I've lit my candles and poured my tea. I've put on my warm comfy socks and my organic lazy shirt given to me by my sister. I've applied the camphor to my nose and settled back for what I hope will be a short and sweet battle.

Some of you may know about my dedication to equality. I have had many years of protesting and letter writing. I have stood outside City Hall buildings and supported the rights of the LGBT Community.




However, what some of you may not know is that in my dear sweet state of North Carolina Gaston County Senator James Forester introduced a bill into the House that states that no other union other than marriage between an opposite sex couple would be recognized in the state of NC. Equality NC had this story listed yesterday.

Gay Marriage Watch shows this today:
Forrester, a Republican who has been the primary lead on the amendment for the past seven years, was joined in sponsoring the legislation by Jerry W. Tillman (R-Montgomery, Randolph) and Dan Soucek (R-Alexander, Ashe, Watauga, Wilkes). Twenty other senators, all Republican, are co-sponsoring the bill. Senate President Pro Tempore Phil Berger (R-Guilford, Rockingham) did not sponsor the amendment.

I get up each morning wondering when the ever present assault on loving relationships will end. How is it that just because it's two women or two men, it's suddenly not only less than, it's also destructive to others. I sit and watch the heterosexual relationships around. Right now, most of the people I interact with are straight. Sometimes, they cheat on their spouse, sometimes they are hateful and mean to each other. Sometimes they are violent. That's not to say that gays and lesbians don't experience this, but my point here is why is it that just because they are opposite sex partners, they have a more "valid" relationship than those of same sex partners.

Is it possible that we just step away from things like laws and decrees when we're talking about another persons freedoms? Can we just let people having their loving relationships and not judge them or apply our own sense of morality to it? Personally I have an issue with people who call names. I don't like it, I think it's immature and hurtful. However, I'm not trying to get a law passed to stop those people from getting health care.... or maybe from visiting their wife or husband in the hospital when he/she is ill. I also don't understand how one can be Christian, however I'm not sitting up on horseback riding around bashing Christians. I can be who I am, and they can be who they are with out having to destroy what each other has.

The first thing you do in a war is dehumanize the enemy so that your army can kill them without remorse. That's whats happening here. Just like those Gays and Lesbians with the pink and black triangles in Europe years ago, our LGBT population is being set apart from the mainstream and told they are not good enough, or equal enough to have the same rights and protections that any other American citizen has, I'll even go further to say, the rights and protections of other HUMAN BEINGS.

Paragraph 175 was added to the penal code in 1871 and it reads: An unnatural sex act committed between persons of male sex or by humans with animals is punishable by imprisonment; the loss of civil rights might also be imposed.

The Nazi party added the following:

Paragraph 175a: Penal servitude up to 10 years or, where there are mitigating circumstances, imprisonment of not less than three months shall apply to: (1) a male who, with violence or the threat of violence to body and soul or life, compels another male to commit a sex offense with him or to allow himself to be abused for a sex offense; (2) a male who, by abusing a relationship of dependence based upon service, employment or subordination, induces another male to commit a sex offense with him or to allow himself to be abused for a sex offense; (3) a male over 21 years of age who seduces a male person under twenty-one years to commit a sex offense with him or to allow himself to be abused for a sex offense; (4) a male who publicly commits a sex offense with males or allows himself to be abused by males for a sex offense or offers himself for the same.

Paragraph 175b: An unnatural sex act committed by humans with animals is punishable by imprisonment; the loss of civil rights might also be imposed.
Paragraph 174 of the penal code forbad incest and other sexual offenses with dependents, while paragraph 176 outlawed pedophilia. Persons convicted under these laws also wore the pink triangle. (stats from www.pink-triangle.org)


You may or may not agree with "Gay Marriage". You may or may not agree with "Gays Adopting Kids", at some point in your life however, you have to decide if your personal moral values should be codified and forced upon every other member of society. I'm thinking if your views are not the majority, that could be a pretty scary prospect.

I'd like to leave you with this:

First They came... - Pastor Martin Niemoller
First they came for the communists,
and I didn't speak out because I wasn't a communist.

Then they came for the trade unionists,
and I didn't speak out because I wasn't a trade unionist.

Then they came for the Jews,
and I didn't speak out because I wasn't a Jew.

Then they came for me
and there was no one left to speak out for me.

Virtual Library

I was looking over my book shelf again and realized that I have a lot of books that I've purchased but didn't really care for. I'm not sure if it's the author's style of writing or perhaps my mind space at the time of reading it, they just didn't seem to make it for me. I've mentioned a couple of times before about maybe having a book sharing club, or a virtual library. Money is tight nowadays and I'm sure that it would be much better to "trade" for a book, instead of paying for a book. That being said I have five books right now that I'm willing to trade for other books.

I'm interested in herbalism and would really like some books related to that. These are the books I have available:

Spells & Charms - Nicola De Pulford
5 Easy Steps to Becoming a Witch - Gilly Sergiev
Witch Crafting - Phyllis Currott
Book of Shadows - Phyllis Currott (my cover is different on this one but it's the same book)
Solitary Witch - Silver Ravenwolf

I also have about 40 books for sale on eBay, which I'll gladly take down and add to the trading library if you see something there you'd like to read. These books range from self help, LGBT topics, Fantasy and even some software books.

I'm also open to suggestions, if you have a book that you'd like to trade that's not on herbalism, just let me know I'll have a look at the description online and we can go from there.

Hopefully this will be a great experience for everyone.

Blessed Be

Workout Master

Happy Thursday! Today I wanted to share some information on a great website I found.

Workoutmaster.com is a website by Ruben Serrano and Aram Hovsepian. These guys have a great way of presenting information in an extremely simple and fun way. They are very funny and provide nutrition and physical fitness information in a way that makes you want to go to the gym.

Here's an example of one of their videos on nutrition.



I follow Aram (@aramhovsepian)and Ruben(@ChekGolfPRO)on Twitter and they post video updates on different items like High Fructose Corn Syrup and how to do a good Squat.

I really enjoy their shows.

Pagan Profile

Sosanna's Pagan Profile




My real name is Renee, my Wicca name is Sosanna

Location: Eastern North Carolina

Profession: Business Analyst

Hobbies/Interests

My hobbies are crocheting blankets, making quilts and researching my family tree. My newest hobby has become blogging.

Blog/Website name: Confessions of a Modern Witch

URL: http://confessionsofamodernwitch.blogspot.com/

If your identity was hidden somehow, (i.e. if you were behind a dark curtain or a sound-proof booth) and someone else was asked to describe you to the person behind the curtain, how would you like to be described OR what would you like this blog circle to know about you?

A childlike trusting soul with a strong belief in equality.

Your spiritual path: Solitary Eclectic

How did you find your current path? I knew that something wasn't right with organized religion, for me, it was missing the basic belief that you should send out happiness and joy to others.

What drew you to and continues to keep you on this path? Each day when I wake, I feel closer to the earth and to nature. This is where I feel the safest.

What, if anything, disappoints you about your path - what would you change if you could? I think if I could change anything it might be that I were around more like minded people. Sometimes being solitary, is just that, very solitary.

What subjects are you interested in reading about - in books, in blogs, etc.? My main interest currently is in the state of our food. We are killing ourselves with chemicals and junk food and no one seems to notice it. There's more corn syrup in our food than nutrients. It's very sad.

What in your life do you consider “sacred?” My relationship with my soulmate, Elijah. He grounds me. He keeps me here in the present and helps me keep that nasty bipolar monster away.

What about you or your life are you working towards changing - short term/long term? I am currently dedicating a lot of time to my blogging. I'd really like to get it together and sit down to write that book I've always wanted to write. Maybe one day soon I'll put pen to pad and begin that journey. For now, it's the blog.

What energies do you want to rid yourself of - what energies do you want to bring in? I want to bring in self esteem and happiness. For many many years in my life I have been very unhappy. I'm finally back on the road I want to be on and I would love to get more positive about my self worth.


What about the world would you like to see change - short term/long term? I'd like to see less violence in the world. People treating people the way they want to be treated, not walking around taking and taking.

What has made and/or continues to make you truly happy? My Daughter and Husband make me happy. I am so glad that both my husband and I have been able to give my daughter the chance to not only go to college but to also attend grad school and live in London as she wants to do. I'm so glad that we were able to be there for her and to help her get what she wants out of life.

What is your favorite word? My favorite word is happiness.

What/who inspires you? My daughter inspires me. The Doctors told me she'd never talk, she's now working on her Master's in London at Goldsmith's University. My husband inspires me, he helps me see each day as a new day and helps me to not live in the past. Minnie Bruce Pratt inspires me. She's a writer and partner to Leslie Feinberg, transgendered author, speaker and activist. Molly McKay inspires me. She is the wife to Davina Kotulski as well as the media director for Marriage Equality USA. I have had the pleasure of walking in a number of pride marches with them both and have watched Leslie and Molly speak on several occasions.


If at the end of your life, you were given a new name, which in one word described your contribution to the the web of life (the connections you made, people you touched, etc., ) what would your name be?
I think my new name would be butterfly. I've started our in a humble way, but along the way I was able to transform myself and become something that is able to fly above the misery and do so with both beauty and honor.

The Butterfly Effect - Open - See the Rainbow

I saw an amazing blog entry today via a blog I follow called "Pagan Culture" This led me to "TwoDressesStudio" It's an amazing project called The Butterfly Project by the Holocaust Museum of Houston.

They are going to collect 1.5 million butterflies to represent the 1.5 million children that died in the Holocaust. This is amazing to me. I love butterflies. I have tattoos all over me of butterflies. I've always seen them as a glimpse of spring, and life and beauty. What a great way to represent the lives that were lost. I'm working on my butterfly today and will be mailing it in to have it counted.


My butterfly will be rainbow colored. It will have pink triangles and black triangles on its wings to represent the Gays and Lesbians that were killed along with the other Jewish People, Gypsies and handicapped under the Nazi rule. A note here, when the camps were liberated by the allied forces, everyone was set free, except for the Gays and Lesbians who were led away to other prisons and were kept in custody.

You can get more information on the Gays and Lesbians in the following links.

The Pink Triangle
Wikipedia
Gays & Lesbians and the Third Reich
Holocaust Rememberance


My Butterfly

Love is Love is Love



Today my heart goes out to all those families out there that cannot obtain legal marriages. These families are treated as second class citizens. They are not allowed rights guarenteed by our Constitution. These are the same rights, that we make sure are applied to our heterosexual citizens, even in prison.

The Supreme Court ruled that the right to be married to the partner of one's own choosing is a fundamental human right. Yes, I said HUMAN right. It's not just something set aside for the wealthy, or the white. We as a people in this country recognize that there are citizens in our nation of all different backgrounds. For many years, it was codified that Blacks and Whites couldn't marry. In fact in Loving v. Virginia, a interracial couple were exiled from their home in Virginia and forced to move to Washington DC, away from their jobs, families and support systems simply because the state of Virginia felt that they (Mr & Mrs Loving) had no "right" to be married. This case was taken to the supreme court and in the decision the following statement was given:

"Marriage is one of the "basic civil rights of man," fundamental to our very existence and survival.... To deny this fundamental freedom on so unsupportable a basis as the racial classifications embodied in these statutes, classifications so directly subversive of the principle of equality at the heart of the Fourteenth Amendment, is surely to deprive all the State's citizens of liberty without due process of law. The Fourteenth Amendment requires that the freedom of choice to marry not be restricted by invidious racial discrimination. Under our Constitution, the freedom to marry, or not marry, a person of another race resides with the individual and cannot be infringed by the State."

Sadly, the state of Alabama in 2000 was the last state to remove racial bias laws from their books as it applies to marriage. That means we've got a long way to go before we can see that marriage is not a Christian right. It's not a white right, or a black right. It's a human right.

Today take a moment to visit the Freedom To Marry page. Read the stories of the families there. The little girl who can't make two mother's day cards. The little boy who isn't allowed to let his dad's come to practice together. The wife who isn't allowed to be at her partner's bedside when she's about to go through Chemo. Shocked? Appalled? You should be. Not only are we codifying discrimination but we are also depriving these families of their basic human rights. In America... you know, land of the free?

Take the pledge and support Marriage Equality today.

There are several Facebook pages related to this topic, but today I found this one. Check out these stories by families who have been hurt by DOMA jon the DOMA Stories: Federal Marriage Discrimination Hurts Families.



Today, I'll leave you with this thought:

The most certain test by which we judge whether a country is really free is the amount of security enjoyed by minorities.~John E. E. Dalberg, Lord Acton, The History of Freedom in Antiquity, [1877].

The i's Have it!

So yesterday my sister comes over for a quick visit and I tell her about my day. I had decided I needed more/better connectivity with my world so I suggest that she add me to her cell plan so I can get a phone w/o having to pay the stupid rates that they have. I mean it's just crazy how expensive it is.

She says... I think we should go get an iPhone. Well hellllllo I'm all over that. So my wonderful sister goes up with me to a new cell carrier and transfers her number to a new iPhone and my wonderful husband says "Happy Valentine's Day" and buys me a sexy new iPhone 4. Ummm Am I the luckiest woman on the planet? Say YES! (nodding vigorously)

Yes, I am spoiled. I have a wonderful family, a loving daughter and husband who always try to make sure I have the gadgets I love. A wonderful sister who added me to her account so she could talk to me daily. Yes, we use the video chat... we're geeks! It certainly made my slightly annoying week 100X better.

So a day late, but never ever forgotten, thanks to my family who will never have to say....

Can you hear me now?

Got Lemons? Don't make Lemonade - Make Tea

Today seems to be a day for fussing amongst friends. I'm seeing several of those close to me fighting and carrying on. I know it seems to be a really important disagreement. Things tend to get heated when everyone is very passionate about their side.

Take a moment. Breath. Think about what's really important.

Some things are more important to me than other things. I can always agree to disagree. I think this is the most effective tool in a heated debate. Be able to accept that just because you believe a certain way, doesn't mean that it's the "right" way. What's "right" for me, may be "wrong" for someone else. We can however agree, that I believe the way I do, and you believe the way you do, and even though we disagree on this particular topic, that doesn't mean that we disagree about everything.

Light a candle and meditate.


Or maybe some tea

That Time of the Month

Yes, you read the title correctly.

That time of the month, Aunt Flow is visiting, in the red, on the rag the list goes on and on.

So what brought this up. Today I woke up and hurried to the rest room due to an impending conference and was greeted to Aunt Flow. I was surprised because I didn't have my usual 2-3 days of cramping and irritability. Why? What's changed?

I'll tell you what's changed, my food intake. I've stopped eating all the processed foods, including chocolate. Now I used to crave chocolate right before my period. However this time I didn't. I've stopped all the sugar and junk food.

I've added green tea to my diet as well. This helps flush the system and get the toxins out.

Last month my cramps were horrible! I was eating 98% Organic Dark Chocolate for the antioxidant qualities. It made me HURT. This month no chocolate, no cramps. :)

I'm sure that this might not work for everyone but I really wanted to share this with others. Just stopping this chocolate and adding my tea has almost completely stopped my discomfort associated with my monthly cycle.

Hopefully this will be useful.

Super Bowl - Food, Ads & Thoughts

The Super Bowl is over and we're finished with football fans seeing their particular team win or lose, or checking out the latest over the edge commercials. Maybe it was the national anthem that was the highlight or the half-time show.

For me, this was the first year that my husband and I ventured out to visit with friends and actually spend the day with other people. We visited some friends and my sister for the evening.


Our Super Bowl Munchies, made by my husband, consisted of a healthy Spinach & Artichoke Dip with organic chips, Amazingly good Black Bean Tacos with Tomatoes, Avacado and home made Pico, he made home made potato skins and a nice fruit salad with fresh melons and blueberries.

I sat with my goodies watching the commercials and was tickled to see the the cute VW Commercial with the kid in the Darth Vadar helmet using the force to crank his parents car. Just adorable.

Here's a peek.



Earlier in the evening they played a commercial by Living Social. This ad was a little strange to me. The story line is a very "manly" fisherman/hunter type guy starts using "Living Social" and begins to become more "refined". He gets in touch with his feminine side. So much so that he turns into a female. I can say that unlike the SNL skit that was in the media last week, at least this ad didn't seem to mock Trans-women and she seemed to be pretty positive about her changes.

Here's a look at this ad:



Now of course I won't even get into the sexual references by GoDaddy.com! But did we expect anything different? That group always makes those types of videos. I think of GoDaddy.com as the Hooter's of ISPs.

Over all, pretty good game. Great Food, Great Friends and overall a pleasant experience.

Paws on my Heart

So if you looked around my house, you'd have no doubt that I am an animal lover. My mother likes to tell a story of how I would have pet flies if you'd let me as a kid. I was always finding critters to bring home and take care of.

Today I look around my house and I have 48 chickens, 3 ducks, 2 Boxers, 5 Chihuahuas, 2 Cats, 3 birds and a ferret.

I do indeed love animals. All animals. It breaks my heart to see abandoned and neglected animals. That's one of the main reason's I stopped eating meat. I just couldn't stand it. Weekly I go to two sites, petfinder.com and petharbor.com to have a look at all the homeless animals there, and post them on facebook to try to help them get homes. I've not had anyone contact me yet to tell me they rescued one of the animals I posted, but I do go back and check from time to time to see if they're still there.

Today I'm sharing these sites here in hopes that someone out there would find their new best friend at the a shelter.

Here are some pics of my babies....


Here we have Melon - my daughter's cat, he's staying with us until she get's settled in London. He'll be headed across the pond next year to move in with his Mommy



Next we have Sheba, she's my hubby's kitty. She's eight years old and tries to swat me sometimes.


This is the only picture I have of the chickens... they are not this little now. They're now out in a big hen house with about 1200 square feet of yard to scratch for bugs... They lay brown eggs.


These are my bully ducks, these two pick on the other little guy down there
This is the poor little thing who gets picked on.


This is Cigi. He's a rescue. He was born deaf. He won't come when you call him, but he will come if you wave at him. Cigi is bigger than this now, I need to get some new pictures.

This is Baphomet Thorn. He's 1/2 German purebred boxer with 16 champions in his line.. but better than that he's got a big ole head and is darn cute!

This is Luna, Butch and Gia in a bed together.


This is Chloe, she's a rescue too.

This is my baby Solstice. She's tiny tiny and loves sleeping on my lap.



Last but not least is my Ferret Latimer. He's the newest addition to the family. Eli build him a great cage and he's in my office with me. He comes out and plays and is really a great boy.



If you have a chance, bring a pet into your life. They'll make you feel so much better.

My Altar

So here are a few pics of the altar. My hubby used plywood and then left the wood natural (cuz I asked him to) and then used a little wood chisel to carve out the Triple Goddess in the back part.

He also made a few wands for me which I have shared with friends. I'm not sure you can see it in the pics but it's on my altar as well. Next he's going to make me a wooden pentacle plaque with the directions and the elements on it.





I forgot to mention my hubby also made the dreamcatcher on the the altar as well. He makes them with the wild grape vines we have in the back yard. He puts little beads on them. They're really great. There's one missing from my altar due to a recent candle/dreamcatcher mishap. But we won't worry about that right now. (hides face)

Yes there's a bit of dust, you can certainly tell I use my broom more than a duster! LOL

Thanks for looking and have a fabulous day!

Blessed Be!

So I did it....

So this was my very first Imbolc. I know that sounds off, I am after all 41 years old and I've been Wiccan for many years. I never really got into the ritual of it all. I was always about live and let live and the rule of three, but never felt the need to participate in a ritual.

When we moved back to NC my husband build me an altar. It has a lovely triple goddess carving in the back and it's got a spot for my books. After I started practicing again I found that I was drawn to the the altar. I wanted to take part in the ritual. I wanted the magic of it all.

Today was amazing. I completed the blessing from beginning to end. Now I had used candle magic in the past and had done a binding/protection spells; but really the only sabbaths I participated in were for Samhain, Beltane and Yule. I'm so glad I decided to do this.

With our new lifestyle, organic and vegetarian, it only made sense to work with the seeds and have a proper ceremony. Unfortunately I didn't have any ritual wear (other than skyclad) so I was just in my regular clothes but it was so worth it.

I'm looking forward to so many more to come. Each and every day I become more and more in line with that girl in the mirror... that one that looks back at me and now smiles at what she sees.

Blessed Be.

Weigh In & Fibro Update

Good Morning Everyone!

I've had an opportunity to share my message of healthy organic living to a small following of my friends on Facebook. I also have been posting in the forums on a site called Patients Like me.

As many of you know about a year ago I decided to clean up my life, inside and out. I decided to go back into active practice of Wicca and to stop putting harmful chemicals in my body.

Just after my 41st birthday I decided that I would stop drinking Sweet Tea, now from a southern girl that's a HUGE deal! I switched to water. By July I was down 40 pounds. In July I watched two movies that changed the way I thought about food. One is called Food Matters and the other is Food Inc. Watching these shows and seeing how food is made, created and processed startled me. Seeing the treatment of the animals, was indeed horrifying. How could I abide by the rule of three, when each bite I took was HARMING. I decided to become a vegetarian.



My life since that decision has become amazing. I have lost 106lbs. I went from a size 24 to a size 10 Missy in just under a year. I feel AMAZING! In November of this last year I started at the gym and began taking vitamin supplements. My energy has increased 100% and my body is thanking me everyday for the positive attention. I picked up a book called "Prescription for Nutritional Healing". The section on FIBRO opened my eyes and let me see that Fibro is just build of toxins in your muscles. It's also seen that most with Fibro have a Vitamin D deficiency. I picked up some vitamin D and some green tea and away I went.

A year ago, my husband couldn't hug me because I would pull away in pain. Today, we cuddle, hold hands and he even picks me up and squeezes me.

I believe that the way to make us all healthier is to get off the toxic foods that are available today and switch to an organic diet. Get rid of those processed foods and junk foods. Open up your life to fresh fruits and veggies. If you must eat meat, choose grass fed over corn fed. Whole Foods Market offers a rating system to choose the meat options that best fit your particular position.

So in summary, my weigh in and update is this... I'm at 162lbs now, yes still obese for my 5'1 frame, but I'm working on it. My water intake is up and my garbage intake is down.

Life is good.

Blessed Be.